Bayonetta

OK.  I loves me some hot avatar action.  Yes, I want to date your avatar.  I want to marry it IRL.  But Bayonetta.... FFS.  Hot pseudo asian chick with glasses whose very weapon is not only her hair but also the only thing she is wearing on her entire body?!?!  Check please.

I tried to play this game.  I tried to judge the design, the controls.  All I find myself doing is desperately seeking that perfect moment when the hair pulls back to reveal the heroine in all her glory.  But it never comes.  (TWSS)

I can't focus on the game itself.  And so I die.  And die.  And die.

I'm passing this review off to Linus.  I can't take it anymore.  I need to go let off some steam...